Despite the desire of daters to connect in person, online dating continues to thrive. You might discover your future companion through the internet, and maintaining their interest necessitates understanding effective communication, particularly in the realm of flirting.
Flirting has long been a challenge, even prior to the emergence of dating apps and the pandemic. Now, in 2025, initiating a conversation with a stranger can feel more daunting than ever. There’s a common fear of coming across as awkward, being judged, or facing rejection.
These concerns are genuine, but to help alleviate the stress of online flirting, we sought guidance from experts.
**How to Flirt Over Text**
Grasping the essence of flirting, as described by Laurie Mintz, Ph.D., author of *Becoming Cliterate* and sex expert for LELO, is vital. Referencing *Psychology Today*, Mintz characterizes flirting as a conventional means of expressing interest and attraction, enabling individuals to assess mutual interest gradually.
Traditionally, flirting involved non-verbal cues and body language. Although the internet may diminish these aspects, it hasn’t entirely transformed how we convey interest.
Dr. Jess Carbino, former sociologist for Tinder and Bumble, asserts that flirting can take place both in real time and asynchronously. In the past, letter writing served as a primary mode of asynchronous flirting communication, with replies sometimes taking weeks or months. In contrast, modern flirting often occurs instantly via text or apps.
To flirt successfully, Mintz recommends utilizing words for compliments, playful teasing, and mentions of availability. Begin with open-ended inquiries regarding their profile or highlight something you observed. Maintain a light-hearted and enjoyable tone, reserving serious discussions for face-to-face encounters. Incorporate emojis and images to express interest.
Relationship coach Melissa Fabello, who holds a Ph.D. in human sexuality studies, highlights the significance of punctuation and emojis in conveying tone. Digital flirting can be tricky due to the absence of body language, so these tools can be instrumental in suggesting and inferring attraction.
Carbino cautions about differing styles of flirting in person versus online. Someone who is courteous face-to-face might approach flirting differently in the digital realm, potentially resulting in mixed signals.
**Should I Use ChatGPT to Flirt?**
Some individuals turn to AI like ChatGPT for crafting flirting messages, but both Mintz and Fabello emphasize the need for authenticity. It’s essential for the other person to be attracted to the true you, rather than a fabricated persona. Fabello advises establishing a clear understanding of your desires and boundaries.
ChatGPT cannot provide insights into your sexual preferences or comfort with intimate talk. Engaging in sexting starts with having a positive relationship with yourself. If flirting online doesn’t suit you, that is perfectly acceptable. Some may prefer to express themselves more effectively in person.
**What About Flirting with Nudes?**
According to Fabello, nudes can be seen as an art form. Embrace creativity when sharing them. Stray from typical angles and settings, and never send photos without consent. Think about how audio and visuals can entice someone without exposing everything.
For further guidance, Mashable provides tips on capturing and storing nudes securely.
**More Digital Flirting Tips**
Don’t shy away from taking chances, Fabello encourages. As long as you respect boundaries, share your sweet or flirtatious thoughts. You might find the response surprising.
Flirting will become more natural over time. Meeting in person allows you to learn what your partner appreciates in text exchanges. If you transition to someone new, your experience will serve you well.
If someone appears unexciting online, they could simply be feeling awkward with digital flirting. It may still be worthwhile to meet them in person.
**How to Flirt in Person**
If an online-only relationship isn’t your goal, plan to meet in person eventually. Mintz advises against prolonging online chats and clarifying your intent to meet.
After the COVID vaccine rollout, Mashable provided tips for in-person flirting, which are quite similar to those for online interactions:
– Be genuine; don’t stress about being captivating.
– Acknowledge that dating involves risks, and that’s perfectly fine.
Flirting is all about signaling interest, whether it’s through a pen or your fingers. It can induce anxiety, but don’t let that deter you.