**Navigating Breakups in the Digital Age: Is It Possible to Truly Sever Connections?**

The digital age was established on the principle of connectivity. Early platforms such as the now-defunct *Friends Reunited* were trailblazers in reviving lost relationships, providing users the opportunity to reconnect with individuals from their past. However, by 2024, platforms like *Friends Reunited* have become obsolete. Breaking free and severing connections has grown increasingly challenging in a world where our online lives are noticeably intertwined. (For context, *Friends Reunited* ceased operations in 2016.)

Currently, our *Facebook* profiles are inundated with hundreds of acquaintances from different moments in our lives. Our *Instagram* timelines act as online journals, documenting every “significant” event. Our lists of followers and those we follow comprise friends, coworkers, and even individuals we scarcely recall—like someone encountered at a gathering years back—now forever able to view our lunch photos.

### The Difficulty of Disconnecting in the Digital Realm

Years ago, terminating a romantic or friendly relationship often meant a definitive split. You weren’t linked to your ex or their circle through constant social media updates. The chances of crossing paths were confined to mutual hangouts or random run-ins. News of life changes spread through word of mouth or chance encounters, as idealized by ’90s sitcoms. Picture *Sex and the City’s* Carrie Bradshaw unexpectedly encountering Big and his new wife, Natasha, without any advance notice. Such experiences now seem like remnants of an uncomplicated era.

In today’s world, fully severing ties after a breakup appears almost unattainable. While relationship specialists agree that we can somewhat manage our connection levels, whether we *ought to* remain linked to an ex is still a point of contention.

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### Encountering Your Ex on Dating Applications

When a relationship concludes, many individuals go through a mental checklist: unfollow or block their ex (particularly if the breakup was contentious), remove shared images, sort out streaming service accounts, and adjust food delivery apps to the proper address. Eventually, they may feel prepared to dive back into the dating pool via apps like Tinder or Bumble. Yet, just a few swipes in, there their ex is—also navigating the dating scene.

Spotting an ex on a dating app can be unsettling, but there are strategies to manage and even circumvent this situation. Applications such as *Hinge* and *Tinder* provide features like “Block Contacts,” which enable users to stop specific individuals from appearing in their match results. This can be accomplished by allowing the app access to one’s contact list or entering contacts manually. Moreover, both applications permit users to block or conceal accounts they’ve already matched or interacted with. For those seeking additional anonymity, “Incognito” modes on platforms like *Tinder* and *Bumble* enable users to swipe while remaining unseen by others.

Dr. Jess Carbino, a former sociologist for *Tinder* and *Bumble*, has led focus groups with app users. She discovered that encountering an ex on a dating app can trigger various feelings, ranging from sadness to anger, particularly if the ex’s profile contradicts how they were viewed during the relationship.

Relationship experts are still divided on the best approach to handle these situations. Dr. Betsy Chung, a relationship authority at *RAW Dating App*, recommends completely cutting ties—at least temporarily—to facilitate the healing process. Conversely, Katie Dissanayake, co-founder and CEO of *After*, highlights that observing an ex on a dating app may sometimes help individuals view them as “just another person in their network.” Nevertheless, she acknowledges that it can also reopen old wounds and impede the ability to move forward.

A recent survey by *Bumble* indicated that 49% of Gen Z and millennial participants prefer not to remain connected with their exes following a breakup. Nearly 40% also eliminate all tangible and digital reminders—such as images and mementos—to assist in their recovery. As Shan Boodram, *Bumble’s* sex and relationships expert, suggests, it’s important to make decisions that resonate with your emotional requirements and boundaries.

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### When Exes Reach Out through Social Media

Even after taking measures to block or create distance, exes might still discover ways to reconnect. The digital landscape has created new channels for unwanted contact, including harassment. For example, Vanessa, 41, from Illinois, recounted that exes and past friends have contacted her through her business’s Facebook page after being blocked on her personal accounts. In one instance, a man she had kissed once years ago messaged her out of the blue, asking to “bury the hatchet” over coffee.

Sebastian, 27, from Mexico City, has undergone subtle surveillance from an ex via Instagram Stories. Although they don’t follow each other, his ex consistently views his stories and even leveraged the death of his dog as a reason to reach out.