If you experienced Season 2, Episode 2 of The Last of Us as an emotional journey, just consider how powerful it was for the show’s leading actors.

In a recent clip from Max, stars Pedro Pascal and Bella Ramsey reminisce about their last days on set and discuss the emotional impact of Joel’s death. During their chat, Ramsey shares an emotional insight regarding her character, Ellie, and expresses what she wishes Ellie had conveyed to Joel before his heartbreaking fate.

“I suppose that Ellie wished she’d told Joel ‘I love you’,” Ramsey confesses. “I don’t believe those words are ever truly mentioned. Together, they seem, I don’t know, quite suppressed.”

For both fans and the cast, Joel’s loss is a hard hit — and it will take some time for everyone to come to terms with it.